The Rat Report


Welcome to the RAT REPORT a (possible) reoccurring feature at The Bad Oracle.  This is where I round up, report, gossip, tattle and rat on what’s going on with the Baltimore small theater scene.  If you have an opinion on whether this should be regular or diediedie after this post, you can make your feelings known by voting in the poll at the bottom of the post.  If you’ve got something you want me to include in a future RAT REPORT, e-mail me at subject RAT REPORT.   And, we’re off!

  • The BAD Oracle proves its name once again by foretelling a bullshit prediction- Spotlighters isn’t going anywhere next year (SO DON’T PANIC IF YOU HAVE PERSISTENT “FUNNY” FEELINGS FOR THE SUPPORT POLES – THERE IS STILL TIME).  In fact, the lease isn’t up on ScaryBasementTown until December 2019.  If you have any bright ideas about where these lost orphans can go after that, though, you’d better call up Fuzz Roark and make it snappy because if I cannot gaze at that amazing picture of Audrey Herman’s bouffant (that hair, I have recently discovered, is my Patronus) in the program ever again, my life will be a desolate place.
  • When I bitched about not knowing what was going on at The Strand it was because I forgot how to use the internet and look up their fucking website.   If I had, I would have noticed that it clearly states that they have a new Artistic Director, Elissa Goetschius AND a new Associate Artistic Director, Amissa Miller.  Both come with stellar pedigrees.  Goetschius has worked with Glass Mind, EMP Collective, Wooly Mammoth, Manhattan Theatre Club, Royal Shakespeare Company AND has a fancy piece of paper from Columbia.  Miller’s bio is just as dizzying/dazzling – she’s a dramaturge, writer, educator and playwright who seems to have been a finalist for a whole bunch of prestigious stuff including the 2012 Gimme Credit International Screenplay Competition and the 2012 Fresh Voice Screenplay Competition.  And she speaks Spanish, bitches.  AND she ALSO has a paper from Columbia.  COINCIDENCE?  Well, no, probably not.  Anyway, good luck, ladies!
  • The Parkway, that gorge Beaux Arts style theater-turned-graffitti-shithole on North Avenue has just received a 2 million dollar Sustainable Communities Tax Credit for planned renovations according The Sun.  The city just sold the building to the Maryland Film Festival for a ritual based one dollar, so, nice.  This is more exciting for the film community than the theater, obvs, but the place apparently used to be a live playhouse and it would be hella fucked up cool to see a move towards that again.  Viva The Parkway!
  • Awww, this is cute:  Open Space Arts, a family based arts company in Reisterstown (it’s primarily teenagers making this happen)  is fundraising for their February production of A Midsummer Night’s Dream set Art Nouveau style in 1905.  That sounds fucking pretty, y’all.  Be generous, help the kids out.  They give a shit.  Donate here.
  • Blind Side Eye Item- When the cat is away, the mice will play.  During a recent performance at this small theater company, several actors decided that they didn’t like one of the numbers in the (original) play and, seeing that the director/writer wasn’t in the audience that day, just decided they weren’t going to perform it.  Even left a couple of their fellow thespians onstage setting up for a song that never happened.  Definitely a ballsy move, but maybe not such a smart one?  Methinks some of these folks might want to watch their asses come audition time but, then again, that’d just be my opinion.
  • AUDITIONS, KIDS-  SpotlightersEdward II by Christopher Marlowe [subtitle:  No, it’s NOT Shakespeare, STUPID] after the first of the year.  If you were thinking of taking your star turn, though, think again because that shiz has been cast so you can’t be Eddie.  Cry a little cry.  Inquires to director Brad Norris at Colonial PlayersBat Boy by Keythe Farley and Brian Flemming [Music and Lyrics by Laurence O’Keefe] Saturday, January 4th and Sunday, January 5th.  Please note that Colonial Players is technically in Annapolis so if your busted jalopy can’t make it down there on the regular, don’t bother.  Info hereArts Collective Howard County Community CollegeRagtime The Musical by Terrence McNally [Music by Stephen Flagherty] Saturday, February 1st and Monday, February 3rd.  It says that even Olds can audition, you don’t have to be a student.  Sign up here.


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